The different types of users – for the IT professional

Author: admin  |  Category: Humor, Observations  |  Comment (1)  |  Add Comment

These are the different types of users for the IT professional:

 

The quiet user:

This is the person who lives with minor issues.  The PC is a little slow, eh, they’ll live with it.  Outlook sometimes won’t load?  They’ll live with it.  They’ll only contact you if their PC is completely out.

 

The uneducated user:

This is the person who claims they know nothing about computers so they’d rather contact you before they do anything. They’re too afraid that if they do something wrong, they’ll break the PC.  You’ll spend a lot of time with these people but most of it will be very minor issues.  These people do have the tendency to learn and, with a lot of time, may become a knowledgeable user.

 

The ignorant user:

Similar to the uneducated user but they never learn.  They ask you the same question again and again, many times in the same day.  You’ll spend a lot of time with them and it will be extremely redundant.  If you are graded on the number of issues you resolve, these people will make you look good, on paper.

 

The vague user:

This is the person who doesn’t know what went wrong, what is going wrong, why they know it’s wrong, but they know it’s wrong.  They’ll also tell you hat “they’re having an issue with Microsoft”. If you’re lucky, they’ll give you half of an error message (usually the unimportant half) and can’t (or won’t) get into describing what is going on but expect you to know how to fix it quickly.

 

The wrong-answer user:

This is the person who won’t answer your questions, for example, “What is your asset number?”  “Um, Windows?”.  “What model printer is it?” “Um, my laptop is an HP”, and “What cubicle are you in? “My phone number is….”.  Good luck with this one.

 

The knowledgeable user:

This is a person who knows how to do basic things on their computer (other than their job).  They can make shortcuts, store favorites, they know the search command, and once in a while they’ll know how to connect to network printers and create new PST files.  When you get a call from them you know it’s something good.  A good sign of them is that they’ll never claim to be a PC expert.

 

The “I know computers” user:

This person claims they know all about computers and they don’t need you, even though they can’t get their PS/2 keyboard to plug into the serial port.  They have 250 icons on their desktop, never clean out their cache, never update anything, and have hundreds of thousands of files in their MyDocuments folder then wonder why their PC is running slow.  They tweak their own system to “improve it” but then it won’t work properly and “what they did didn’t cause it to not work”.  (i.e. “I changed my DNS settings to allow my computer to connect to the internet faster but now I can’t get to our intranet sites, don’t tell me that what I changed did it, I know for a fact that they are unrelated.  The worst is when an ignorant user teams up with this person.

 

The “I’m important” user:

This person doesn’t care about other people (usually a member of management).  They don’t care that you’re trying to get the LAN back on line for over 100 users, their issue with their Internet Explorer favorites is far more important.  They are also usually on their way to a meeting or a trip and need it fixed ASAP.

 

The buddy user:

This person will act like your buddy.  They’ll try to chat you up whenever they can (including when you’re trying to learn) for two reasons.  First, being their “buddy” they feel that they are a higher priority than everyone else (see “I’m important user”) and also to pick your brain on PC troubleshooting (see the “I know computers” user).  They’ll take take take but when you ask them for a favor they’re too busy or can’t.  They’ll expect you to go to their house to set up a 128 bit encrypted WLAN with 5 PCs and 3 printers on a Saturday night but never let you borrow one of his (many) pens.

 

The funny user;

They think everything is funny and laugh at it.  Their voicemails are usually something like: “Ha ha!  This is so great, our server got knocked over and parts are all over the floor, it’s so funny, but now no one can get to the internet!”

 

The “I hate computers” user

These are the people who think the whole computer industry is out to get them.  They make programs that deliberately not work for them and they have nothing but issues with every computer that they’ve ever had.  They are usually also long-winded users.

 

The long-winded user:

This is a person who will go over their issue, in depth.  They’ll spend 20 minutes explaining a while chain of events, this lead to that, just to get to their issue, which is usually something that could have been explained in a few seconds.  They’ll also leave 3 page emails to let you know that their fonts aren’t working properly.  You’ll quite often want to shout at them “Get to the point!”

 

The “I deserve the same” user:

This is a person who expects to be treated like everyone else, all at once.  One person gets a new computer, they deserve a new computer.  Another person got a new mouse, they deserve a new mouse.

 

The “I don’t care about the rules” user:

They are also usually “I’m important” users.  They don’t care about rules, policies, costs and so on, and why should they?  It’s not their name on the work order, it’s yours, so if someone gets in trouble, it won’t be them.  They also don’t want to go though the proper channels, they expect you to do everything for them (even if you can’t do anything for their issue).  They also usually also have your boss on speed dial.

 

The OCD user:

This is the person who will call you, then send you an email, then send you a text message, send you a message though IM, another email, another call, another email, another text, another email, another IM, another call, another text, 3 more emails, 2 more calls, 5 more text messages, 3 more IMs, and 2 more emails.  All in 15 minutes.

 

The impatient user:

This person expects you to be where they need you when they need you.  You also need to fix their issue in a matter of seconds regardless if you have parts in stock or not.  If you don’t have the parts in stock they expect you to pull it out of someone else’s computer.  These users also love to come and see you right before they go on vacation (I always found it’s interesting how people need their work computers when they’re on vacation).  These are usually also “I don’t care about the rules” and “I’m important” users.

 

The exaggerating user:

These people exaggerate everything.  “I’ve been having this problem for months!”  “It takes over an hour for my computer to turn on!”, “I get the blue screen twenty times a day”.  Rarely do any kind of reporting support their claims, though.

 

The appreciative user:

This is the one person in your office who will say “please” and “thank you”.

The birth of WWIII

Author: admin  |  Category: Thoughts  |  Comments (0)  |  Add Comment

Hopefully a month from now people will say I was paranoid, a doom caller, a rabble rouser, but for now, this is how I feel things are going to go.

It should come as no surprise to most people that the US has a lot of enemies, deliberate / obvious (Iran, North Korea, Al-Qaeda etc..) and ones who are stealth about it or possible enemies (Saudi Arabia etc..).  Al-Qaeda has also proven that they are willing to attempt their own “regime change”, just look at the Madrid, Spain commuter train bombing (March 11, 2004).  Since it was linked to Al-Qaeda in response to Spain’s presence in Iraq, the election swung 180 degrees.  A day before the party that supported Spanish troops in Iraq was ahead in the pools by a landslide and when the link was discovered, just in time for elections, the opposition side won by a landslide.

Terrorist organizations want Democrats in power.  Republicans generally want to keep our troops in hotspots where the terrorists are working (Afghanistan etc.) but the terrorists don’t want this.  They want to be able to roam the countryside freely (like they used to under Taliban rule).  The election is still close, even though polls show Obama is in the lead, it is still very close.

So, I think Al-Qaeda’s plan is to commit an act that would swing the election away form the Republicans and strongly in the Democrat’s favor.  How?  A major attack on the US, something that would dwarf Sept 11, 2001.  They would need to time it just right, long enough before the election to have the blame pinned on them and strike anger and fear into Americans but not long enough so that we are not voting in anger.  So the most effective time for them to do this would be during the last week to week and a half during October (Oct 22 and on).

What event would strike at America during that time?  There is one huge event going on then, the baseball World Series.  Right now we know it will be in Philadelphia so that gives them time to prepare and games one and two will be in Philadelphia.  This is an event that everyone could watch unfold on live TV.  I don’t know the extent of this.  Crash a plane into it?  That’s how they did it on 9-11.  I am scared to think of the alternative.

Back in the mid to late 1990s Russia (formerly known as the Soviet Union) reported that they were “missing” several suitcase nukes.  Nuclear weapons that fit in two suitcases (the US had their own “backpack nukes”).  Even though they’re small, you don’t need much to strike fear into the US.  Just look at the movie “The Sum of All Fears”.

The really scary part is that a WMB strike during the world series would be considered a first strike so the US would have nothing restraining them from using nukes against those responsible.  You can see how this could easily escalate into a huge global conflict.

The world economy is in shambles and the last time this happened was during the 1930s into he 1940s What stopped it?  WWII.  Depression and weak economies spawn wars and this is the strongest global recession / depression that the world has seen, ever.

I do pray a month from now that I have people posting comments “Ha ha, you were wrong”.  Seriously, I do.  But I do ask people here in the US, especially in Philadelphia, Boston, and Tampa, to pay attention.  Note anything out of the ordinary, even report it if needed.

Linens ‘N Things & George Foreman grills – why did I bother?

Author: admin  |  Category: Rant  |  Comments (2)  |  Add Comment

Right now I am really mad at Linens ‘n Things and the George Foreman grills.

I went to the Linens ‘N Things that was having their clearance on Okeechobee Blvd in West Palm Beach. I purchased a George Foreman grill (Model GR44BWVTCAN). It was a nice grill – the one that is larger in size and you can control the heat on each side separately. It was marked down (due to the clearance) from $100 to $60. Note: This was NOT a demo / display unit. It was brand new, sealed in the box.

The next night I went to use it, I figured it would be a good night for some chicken and vegetables on that grill. To my surprise, only half of the grill worked. The right half would not heat up. I had it set to 400 degrees and 10 minutes later (as it was still “on”) I could put my hand on it (and not get burned).

I called the store and I was told that they were out but since it was new and sealed, I should be able to exchange it at another location. So, I went to the location in Coral Springs, FL and the cashier called the manager. He said he couldn’t take it back (I worked in retail enough to know that if you sell a product, you can take it back and send it back for a refund, with very few exceptions). Not only did I get the impression that he didn’t really care about my situation, he tried to walk away with my receipt! I made sure I took it from him as he was turning to walk away.

Disappointed, I sent an email to the only email address I could find (on their website) and someone got back to me. I was told that I didn’t purchase it at a Linens N Things (funny, the store said “Linens ‘N Things”, the receipt said “Linens ‘N Things” and so did all of the name badges of the people working there. He told me to call the manager at the store in West Palm.

I called her and she said that they could exchange it for the same amount of money in other products. A lot of good that would do me, by then they had nothing I’d want.

I’ve also looked around for warranty information for these grills since the documentation states that there is a warranty but no contact information. Guess what? They have no site (a Google search only provides people selling the grills, no manufacturer or warranty contact information).

Right now I am on the verge of calling my credit card and protesting the charges since I bought something, it does not work, and no one is willing to help me with it.

Both candidates are hypocrites!

Author: admin  |  Category: Politics  |  Comments (0)  |  Add Comment

That is right – they both are hypocrites. Why?

Simple – they both claim that they want to improve the environment. If this is true, why am I receiving so much junk mail (physical snail-mail) from both of them? To make matters worse, not a single piece of this junk has any kind of verbiage stating that it was printed on recycled paper.

Come on you two, practice what you preach.

AND WHO IS GOING TO CLEAN UP ALL OF THESE SIGNS?